Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem

Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem, Are You Living in a Shell?

Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem

Author: Marco Auciello

When you are living as a ‘shell person’ yourself, you are not just vulnerable to other ‘shell people’, but you are vulnerable to your own attacks upon yourself. You live in a state of what we call cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is a rather obtuse term for something we all know all too well. It simply means that when you identify yourself with your fragile shell, you are one person deep inside, but project a false self to others that is not the same at all. The shell wants others to think this and that about it. The shell wants to live up to its own false and superficial expectations of you. The shell has created expectations that have nothing to do with who you truly are.

Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem This creates a state of tension in you. In this state there is no harmony, but there is harmony’s opposite. In order to understand it better, imagine, for example, that you are listening to a beautiful piece of music played by several musicians who are in perfect sync with each other. That is a harmonious experience. Now, in contrast, imagine that you are listening to a group of musicians who are playing without regard for the others. Each musician is playing a different tune with different rhythms. That painful listening experience is not harmonious. It is dissonant.

Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem

Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem

It is ironic that once we shed our dissonance and align ourselves harmoniously with who we truly are, we stop fearing the criticisms of others. We feel happy and free of our shell and happy and fearless to be who we truly are. We live in harmony. The tension and irritation of dissonance falls away. It is so liberating and joyous to be liberated from our shells that we stop pushing a false self, a shell, out toward other people with the hope they will approve of us. The more we have this experience of freedom, the less we will try to get others to admire, approve of and love us. Should we start seeking admiration, approval from others in order to feel loved, we invite the false ego, the shell, to rebuild itself. If we continue to build the false ego long enough by living in hope that others approve, we will become a shell person again.

Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem Letting go of the shell allows the real you to emerge into the world in all its brilliance. You will shine. You will have access to your full potential that has always lived inside you, but had receded behind your efforts to have others admire and approve of you. With the destruction of your false ego, you will have access to a vast and untapped potential, accessible to the real you! That untapped potential was never accessible to the shell you had lived as. The shell was more outward focused, seeking the approval and admiration of others and defending itself against their criticisms and lack of approval…their withholding. When the shell drops and we become aligned and identified with who we truly are, we experience authentic power, genuine charisma and charm. We experience these things so much more intensely than we ever imagined and we can naturally and easily become a force for good in the world.

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About the Author Marco Auciello from Melbourne Cognitive Hypnotherapy has been helping clients improve their self-esteem with hypnotherapy. Through cognitive psychology, and advanced coaching skills, he has helped people quit smoking, weight loss with hypnotherapy or just improve their overall outlook on life. You can visit his website to find out more at: Melbourne Hypnotherapy Coaching

Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem


Have you ever lived in a shell?  Are you living your true potential, or pretending to live it on the outside while you suffer from low self-esteem on the inside? Sadly, this is a common occurrence.  Self-esteem is a process.  Comment if you agree.

I hope you have enjoyed, “Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem“, Are you Living in a Shell?

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Jeanne Melanson

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Born in Nova Scotia, I moved to the United States 20+ years ago.I am a dedicated lover of animals and fight for their rights and protection.I love people too, of course, and enjoy meeting folks from all walks of life.I enjoy philosophical discussion, laughing, and really odd ball stuff.I hope you enjoy my site.Leave me a comment to let me know you were here!Peace out.
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16 thoughts on “Cognitive Dissonance and your Self-Esteem, Are You Living in a Shell?

  1. Awesome post! Living in your shell is no way to live…(unless you’re a turtle) Being who you truly are on the inside and outside is the way to happiness and personal freedom! Great post!

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